Category: AltPorn Updates
BurningAngel: Kylee Couches It Up
MelisandeOctober 14, 2006
Her dog is so cute! And her leather couch is even cuter, though I don’t know what’s going on with the coverlet. I say, if you’ve got leather, show it...
RazorDolls: Chole Cre’ture Endorses Red Chairs
MelisandeOctober 13, 2006
The chair that RazorDoll Chole is sitting on would be perfect with my vintage Formica kitchen table. I can’t wait to re-enact The Bridges of Madison County with an...
BlueBlood: Victoria Sin Shows Off Her Beautiful Ass
MelisandeOctober 12, 2006
… and an even more beautiful black leather lounger. I don’t know what I want more, Victoria or that lounger! Someone at BlueBlood has excellent taste in...
InkyGirls: Richard Goths Out Her Panties
MelisandeOctober 12, 2006
Just in time for Halloween, here’s InkyGirl Richard showing off the latest in goth panty fashion. I totally dig the spiderweb charm. It’s cutesy-wutesy in...
Deviant Nation: Apnea – Coulrophobia
EdRothOctober 11, 2006
Apnea, I hate to break this to you, but that’s not the way to blow up a balloon. You keep trying, though. I like the cut of your jib, and Deviant Nation will do...
BurningAngel: Adahlia Gets Popped In Living BMP IMG Color
MelisandeOctober 11, 2006
The photo below the text? Is a bitmap image. Who uses bitmap images anymore? And why am I focusing more on that than the girls making out? BurningAngel writes: I popped...
BlueBlood: Roxy DeVille Will Cut You, Bitch
MelisandeOctober 10, 2006
And she’ll look fucking hot doing it. Even if there’s a giant vulture scuplture in the room. As noted Libertarian ballroom dancer and sex expert Tucker...
CyberDyke: Stupid Boy. Let’s Get Some Shoes. Let’s Party.
MelisandeOctober 10, 2006
Tess battling evil shoe saleswomen with a purple stuffed dragon backing her up would be totally awesome. These shoes rule!
BurningAngel: Angela Ryan Rocks Some Blue Jeans
MelisandeOctober 9, 2006
If I say something too snarky here, Angela Ryan might attack me with her bangin’ rack. And it’d probably leave a nasty mark! BurningAngel writes: Angela Ryan...
RazorDolls: Page Morgan’s Got Hairspray And She’s Not Afraid To Use It
MelisandeOctober 9, 2006
Page is sporting quite a bouffant. Not sure what the deal is with the bottle stuffed into the cleavage, though. And where did they find such 70s wood paneling out in the...
BlueBlood: Ariel X, Gagged
MelisandeOctober 8, 2006
If you’re into Ariel X sporting stockings, nipple clamps and a ballgag, then check out this photoset. Or, if you need some all-caps encouragement: BREAKING NEWS:...
CyberDyke: Lulu’s Undergarments Are Unstoppable
MelisandeOctober 8, 2006
I love old-school pantaloons! I wish girls still wore those instead of synthetic thong craptasticalness. BO-RING! Let’s hear it for silk tap pants! CyberDyke...
DeviantNation: Jane Jett, Vinyl Aficionado
MelisandeOctober 7, 2006
Did you know that Jane Jett is one of the few people outside the Greater Chicagoland Area who owns every Wax Trax! Records vinyl release? It’s true! [Note: not...
BurningAngel: Ms. Jade Models The Latest In Scarf Technology
MelisandeOctober 7, 2006
The blurb says something about Jade being “really fuckin’ hot in these pants,” but I’m too focused on the scarf–OH, AND THE...
Nerdpr0n: Dear Lord, Knitting Porn
MelisandeOctober 6, 2006
Dear Anna, I don’t even know how to respond to this. I do know that I need to take you shopping at Jennifer Convertibles for a nice leather couch! Love, Melisande...
RazorDolls: Sasha Sparks Loves Her Dildo, I Just Love Her Tits
MelisandeOctober 6, 2006
Damn, those are some tig ol’ bitties. Forget the dildo, can I just look at the boobies? Please let me look at the boobies. RazorDolls writes: We had the pleasure...
BlueBlood: Darenzia sez “Fuck All Y’all!”
EdRothOctober 5, 2006
Sticky Fingaz may have told us to BACDAFUCUP, but I’m more interested in what sultry fetish erotica goddess Darenzia has to say about telling me to go fuck myself....
BurningAngel: Joanna’s Fasting
EdRothOctober 4, 2006
Hey, Joanna kinda looks good in this pic! Guilt works, baby. BurningAngel writes: Joanna is busy repenting for her sins so she can’t update today but she does love...
DeviantNation: Graveyard Sally’s Old Jalopy
MelisandeOctober 3, 2006
Here’s two things I enjoy seeing together: old cars and tattooed models. Model T? No, Model Sally! DeviantNation writes: Graveyard Sally shows us her love for old...
DeviantNation: cerah Solves My “PC LOAD LETTER” Problem
EdRothOctober 3, 2006
Pale, red hair, and in business formal? This is unbelievably hot. We should hang out, cerah. DeviantNation writes: Photographer: LiquidLight “Listen, are you gonna...
BurningAngel: Lee Enjoys Painted Orange Walls In The Nude
MelisandeOctober 2, 2006
If what’s stated in the blurb is true, I sure hope the Martha Stewart Everyday Colors paint line has some orange shades in it. Naked girls in front of orange...
DeviantNation: Angel With Scars
MelisandeOctober 2, 2006
I am really into scarification, so it goes without saying that I am fixated by the scars on Angel’s legs. Damn. That’s on the near edge of hardcore....
BlueBlood: Roxy DeVille is Girl 666
EdRothOctober 1, 2006
Sometimes Roxy DeVille calls me up to shoot the breeze about things like early west-coast gangsta rap or whether she should be wearing panties. And I usually say...
BurningAngel: A Cliché Poem For Aurora, As Requested
MelisandeOctober 1, 2006
Haiku for Aurora’s Pink Panties A pink cotton crotch right in my face. I am dead. So totally dead. BurningAngel writes: Roses are red, violets are blue,...
BlueBlood: Roxy DeVille Owns The Spider’s Lullabye On Vinyl
EdRothSeptember 30, 2006
Why is it that BlueBlood gets all the hottest, coolest chicks? Case in point: Roxy DeVille, superhottie and cool as fuck. The lips, tits, skirt and stockings are all...
RazorDolls: “Great Hotel Bedspreads with Zoe Matthews” Is Season Passed On My TiVo
MelisandeSeptember 30, 2006
Zoe should really consider a career as a cable television travel show host. Think of all the hotel and motel bedding she could showcase! RazorDolls writes: If you havnt...
SpookyBlog: Bella Vendetta Riding on the Subway Naked
EdRothSeptember 29, 2006
Who’s the hottest chick on the planet? Well, I’m not sure, but surely in the running is the lovely Bella Vendetta, whom I’ll forgive for not wearing...
DeviantNation: Hilton Sports Hipster Star Tattoos
MelisandeSeptember 29, 2006
That’s a cute and beautiful lil star tattoo on Hilton’s back. And also note the cute and beautiful lil heart tattoo on her wrist. I like things that are cute...
Nerdpr0n: Anna’s Polka Dot Panties FTW!
MelisandeSeptember 28, 2006
Dear Anna, I want to come home to this after a long day slaving away at the salt mines. Love, Melisande Nerdpr0n writes: I took the sweetest darlingest pair of panties I...
BurningAngel: Whisky != Dick
MelisandeSeptember 28, 2006
Because she’s a girrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrl, a-duh. And like the blurb says, she’s a nice girl with killer boobs. I mean, look at them! Don’t those boobs kill...
BlueBlood: Kellie And Andy And A Fifth Of Jack
MelisandeSeptember 27, 2006
Domestic bliss can be achieved with liberal application of Jack Daniels. Also, writing “SLUT” on your husband’s chest in fake blood can be a turn-on....
DeviantNation: Aries Is Like A Box Of Chocolates
MelisandeSeptember 27, 2006
… and that’s where the Forrest Gump references end, because I just want to eat Aries up in one shot while watching my TiVo’d copy of the “Dancing...
CyberDyke: Candice Plays With Fun Dildo Toys
MelisandeSeptember 26, 2006
Oh, Candice. I love your taste in dildos. Have you considered checking out some of the higher-end glass dildos on the market? I would greatly enjoy your take–or...
BurningAngel: Jane The Alt.Porn Hooters Girl
MelisandeSeptember 26, 2006
Jane could eat Hooters shrimp with me anytime! More cute emo girls should get jobs at Hooters. We all know emo boys need to get a little meat on their bones, and what...
DeviantNation: Miesha Has A New Pirattitude
MelisandeSeptember 25, 2006
This would have been the perfect International Talk Like A Pirate Day tie-in post! … but I missed it by a week. My bad. Anyway, Miesha totally has pirattitude, as...
RazorDolls: Mika Tan And Lystra Model The Latest In Cowboy Hat Technology
MelisandeSeptember 25, 2006
When I think of corn-fed cowgirls, I do not think of Mika Tan and Lystra. It’s like my farmhand daydream has been hijacked by some altporn-minded higher power!...
BurningAngel: Send Me An Angelle, Right Now
MelisandeSeptember 24, 2006
Angelle’s pose reminds me of the daily outfit photos a blogger in Rhode Island is currently posting. I won’t link her because she’d probably freak out...
DeviantNation: Sin Has Big Boobs
MelisandeSeptember 24, 2006
I would comment on Sin’s interesting lower lip piercing, but I am so distracted by her hefty boobs I can’t even think of what I was going to say....
NoFauxxx: Avarice’s Rooftop Fun
MelisandeSeptember 23, 2006
Is that a little bit of bondage with coaxial cable I spy? Now that’s kinky! It’s not going to help you watch “Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip”...
BlueBlood: Girls Kissing, Now With 100% More Blood
MelisandeSeptember 23, 2006
Everyone enjoys girls kissing, right? But only the discriminating few enjoy girls kissing whilst engaging in bloodplay. Are you one of the discriminating few?
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