Category: AltPorn Updates

RazorDolls: Hay Guys, Who Wants A Threesome?

Sometimes you just have to pick up a girl and rail her on a flower print bedspread while another girl grabs her tits. Threesomes: it’s what’s for dinner!...

BlueBlood: Erica The Red House Painter

I expect a negative number of people to get the obscurely obvious band reference in the title of this post. And no, I’m not talking about the Viking metal album...

SpookyBlog: Buy Voltaire A Beer!

I would love to watch Voltaire drink beer but I’m way too intimidated by her full-body art to ask her if I can tag along to the nearest dive bar. I’d pick up...

BlueBlood: I’m Captivated By Xanthia’s Gazongas

I’m also captivated by Xanthia’s eye makeup and dyed eyebrows. But mostly I’m captivated by her tits.

InkyGirls: Do You Need Discipline?

Zoie’s taste in old-school wall mirrors and other home furnishings is impeccable. Why would one want to paddle a girl into little tealight candles on wall shelves?...

Burning Angel: Morgan Models The Latest In Brassieres And Bullet Belts

Morgan proves you can find everything for your fall fashion wardrobe at a lingerie shop and an Army-Navy surplus store. Burning Angel writes: I once had a bullet belt,...

BlueBlood: Alsana Feeds On The Blood Of Internet Nerds

Obviously, Alsana’s table manners would scandalize the hoi polloi.

Nerdpr0n: Reading In Fishnets Is Fundamental

When reading Robert Anton Wilson, one should take care to wear appropriate clothing. Anna Logue is a perfect example of this. She celebrates the joy of reading! Nerdpr0n...

SpookyBlog: Just You and Me, Blue Haired Girl

I know a girl who is almost a dead ringer for Agent Aeon, expect not so much with the blue hair and lip piercing. Do I tell her she’s got a Goth doppleganger? What...

CyberDyke: Dinner Is Served Al Fresco, In Stockings

I love girls who aren’t afraid to use their hands. Or their dildos. CyberDyke writes: Sappho’s Girls Cyber-Dyke–porn for women, by women! Click here...

Burning Angel: Greets To Riley Mason!

This just in from the altporn.net Situation Room: Riley continues to be adorable. Burning Angel writes: I get like, at least 20 emails a day requesting Riley...

Burning Angel: Group Hug Time!

Check it–Burning Angels like to party and have a good time, just like the rest of us! I’d love to be their MySpace friends. What great photo albums they must...

Burning Angel: Turtle Power … In My Pants

Here’s a comic fanboy nerd’s wet dream–a girl in bra and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles panties! I’m pretty sure those comics she’s lying on...

RazorDolls: I Wanna Have Sex With Eddie Van Halen’s Guitar

Huh uh uh, he said “Flying V.” RazorDolls writes: Now whens the last time you walked into a guitar shop and saw a naked Babe stradling a Flying V, and...

Nerdpr0n: I Make Passes At Girls With Glasses

This is what I like to believe Anna is thinking when this photo was taken: What is this? A big bulge in the pants? I must investigate using all my intellectual powers...

CyberDyke: Veronika Strikes A Pose

I would proudly display a statue of this Veronika pose in my foyer. Of course, if Veronika herself wanted to pose in my foyer, I certainly wouldn’t say no!...

Burning Angel: Angela Ryan in Latex

For those whose appetites have not yet been sated by our current featured model Angela Ryan, I bring you more of featured model Angela Ryan … in Latex (as opposed...

RazorDolls: Jade Starr Makes Me Have Goth Girl Flashbacks

Jade has the cutest little cootie-pie that I ever did see. Peeeeeeeeeeeeeekaboo! Peeeeeeeeeeeeeekaboo! RazorDolls writes: After becoming a huge star in the adult...

Burning Angel: Chelsea Gets A Time Out

If you’re sent to the corner, you have to remove your pants. But please, keep the Chucks on. Safety first! Burning Angel writes: Take a look at our newest angel: a...

RazorDolls: Rob Rotten Has Nice Pants

Whenever I see a guy with a lot of upper body ink, I just want to pet his pants, much like how Gabriella is demonstrating here. RazorDolls writes: The notorious Rob...

SpookyBlog: Attack of the Pantyless Candy Ravers!

Remind me to wear a chastity belt the next time I see DJ Tiesto. I don’t want any candy kids stealing my panties! SpookyBlog writes: This super hot Kitten...

CyberDyke: Lacey reading in the nude

Here in Hell, it can be difficult to meet a woman who even knows how to read, much less actually enjoys it. And reading naked?! Unheard of! CyberDyke writes:...

Nerdpr0n: Anna + Bones + Spock + Kirk = hot Trekkie foursome

Can someone write me a fanfic for this pairing? I’ll trade you some hot Mistress Janeway fic! Nerdpr0n writes: yay! me in a Star Trek shirt! Spock in between my...

RazorDolls: Riley Mason in Front of the Green Door

Why, Riley, you are adorable! But that lime green sliding door behind you cries out for the cast of Extreme Makeover: Pr0n Edition. I bet there’s corkboard and...

Burning Angel: I see Angelle’s panties!

Hey, do you remember when the guy who played Agent Dale Cooper on Twin Peaks hosted Saturday Night Live and did a skit where he repeatedly asked people to bite his butt?...

Burning Angel: New Morgan Mae video!

If a picture is worth a thousand words, then how many is a video worth? I don’t know either, so watch the vid and get back to me about it… Burning Angel...

Burning Angel: Insert “V for Vendetta” Reference Here

If Natalie Portman had dressed like this in V for Vendetta, fanboy spooge would have flooded American multiplexes. No amount of squeegee mops could have cleaned up all...

RazorDolls: Dreaming of Serene Dream

I’d fight my way through the seven gates of Hell for a little alone time with Serene Dream! “When reality’s a dream and every lie is true In the day...

BlueBlood: Rufflebutt!

Ariel X is all up on here lately, with lots of fabulous sets on Blue Blood and Razordolls. This time she demonstates that Ariel indeed does have back.

Burning Angel: Adahlia’s ink

Adahlia’s pretty inked up form what can be seen here, but I wonder what more tattoos hide behind that shirt… Burning Angel writes: If you would like to watch...

BlueBlood: Bella Vendetta sports the Blue Blood hoodie

Bella Vendetta is a supersmart total hottie who rocks so hard I could just pee myself. Who better to be featured by the Blue Blood crew in one of their classic hoodies?...

Burning Angel: More Pics of Pixie Pearl

Let me interpret Ms. Pearl’s body language for you: Greetings, computer nerds. I’m going to sit next to you in your computer nerd haven and chainsmoke Camel...

BlueBlood: Kellie wants to hurt you and she wants you dead

Can anyone match the rivetchick hottitude of Kellie? No, they cannot. The Headmistress of The Blut Royale took time out from keeping your ass in line to pose for a great...

InkyGirls: Marie: Amped

I prefer roadies who wear pants and sensible shoes. However, I’ll make an exception for Marie and her sexxxxxxay black patent platforms. InkyGirls writes:...

Nerdpr0n: Error messages that you want to see…

Projecting error messages onto a hot ass is clearly the way to go. Hopefully all next-gen operating systems will do this! Nerdpr0n writes: This set is a follow-up to the...

BlueBlood: Ariel X has a present for all of you

Darkseid and I have decided that Ariel X is our favorite Russian/Irish adult superstar who was born in California. Why? Because she’s the gift that keeps on...

BlueBlood: Snowblood will fuck you up

I believe there is little hotter in this world than a woman stalkin’, walkin’ in her big black boots. When she’s wearing nothing but a belt and sheer...

Burning Angel: Sinead – she only *looks* too young!

Am I too pervy if I want to fuck her while she’s kneeling in the little red wagon? What about if she’s holding that stuffed bunny at the same time? [Ed:...

RazorDolls: The Masque and the red head

The way is not easy, I know, but I will take you by the hand and lead you through the cruel light into the velvet darkness. RazorDolls writes: Looks like were at it...

BlueBlood: Yolanda is a dirty girl

Yolanda is a dirty girl and must be cleaned. Bathe her, and bring her to me!